Book of D: Hello Ŧexas Ŧech: A Two-day Sabbatical in the Hub City

We are visiting my wife's family in Lubbock (a.k.a. the "Hub City"). There was a death in the family, so we left Midland Friday evening to come to Lubbock to be supportive of her family. There is a "red flag warning" in effect back home, so we left early to avoid the high winds that are routine around West Texas. The "red flag warning" is the unconventional part. Anyway, Lubbock has a special place in my heart. Although it is much too conservative for this centrist person's taste, it plays host to my alma mater, Ŧexas Ŧech University. I didn't attend Ŧech for very long, but it was long enough that I am considered alumna and I have the credentials. It's a long, drawn out story to recollect why I did not stay in Lubbock following high school graduation to complete my degree plan at Ŧech, so I will forego that anecdote. I just feel at ease when I am in Lubbock; perhaps more for the camaraderie of the college town and for my family and friends who reside here. To say there is simplicity of living in Lubbock is an oxymoron, though. You see, if you are not white, in the upper financial echelon in society, or part of the republican party, you're probably going to get vexed really quickly if you live here or spend too much time here. I know my wife and I can only muster a couple of days of respite or vacay because the people of Lubbock can be racist, ignorant, and exptremely tribal and individualistic thinking. I have often said that the beautiful campus of my almighty Ŧexas Ŧech would be perfection were it situated smack in the middle of Austin. The beauty of our U rivals the current U in Austin, but the architecture is so much better at Ŧexas Ŧech among a myriad of other things. I do not hate UT, because I am attending one of the 14 UT System (UTS) schools: the University of Texas Permian Basin. It would be kind of contradictory for me to hate anything UTS because it has provided me a valuable education and sublime experience as both a student and employee. I have attended several events, training, and meetings at UT and have even served as a member of the UTS Student Council and been at their beautiful UT System Building and visited with the UTS Board of Regents. I have been offered a few jobs at UT, but my wie and I are not quite ready to move to Austin. Her career with DPS has taken off, and she has a salient position as the Program Supervisor / Field Operations for DPS. She manages a huge district that consists of several towns in West/Central Texas. Anyway, once again, our reason for coming to the "Hub City" this weekend was to be with family; to support them during their loss, but my wife and I also needed to get away for a couple of days. Even though Lubbock is a mere 119 miles away, it is still "out-of-town," and it is always nice to spend time with our uncle and his family. They've always been accepting of my wife and I and our relationship, and they have always been supportive. Their love and generosity have made it easy to reciprocate the support and affection; moreover, it has made it easy for us to help them out whenever the need arises. So, off to enjoy the time here. It turns out, this post is more of a rant. LOL. 

Book of D: Earth to Counselor . . . Do No Harm.

Today's counseling sessions with my three Friday clients proved unusual. Unusual is better than noneventful. ¿N ‘est pas? Each person has underlying issues - as most clients do. I have them in my own case with my own counselor. The main thing is to remember what each client is bringing to the table, per se. Much like my own counselor's approach with me. Our number one rule in the counseling code of ethics and principles of counseling is nonmaleficence: do no harm. That was a difficult concept for me to understand. The reason was that I viewed the term do no harm in a very literal way. After all this time in grad school, and so many hours of practicum and internship where I have counseled many clients, I have come to comprehend that do no harm just means not interfering in the client's progress of success. Moreover, it means honoring the Hippocratic Oath. It means honoring the Ethical Principles of Counseling. Do no harm doesn't mean that we have the power to impose actual harm. It's not MMA, the UFC or the WWE. Counseling is the process of a person (the client) seeking counseling (not answers) from an extensively trained counselor (LPC). And when the process works, it is beautiful.

Ethical Principles in Counseling

·       Autonomy

·       Nonmaleficence

·       Beneficence

·       Justice

·       Fidelity

·       Veracity

Differences between counselling and patient education

• Counseling can encompass advising, educating, and simply listening and

reflecting back on what has been heard while Patient education is the

provision of information on a specific topic to a patient.

• Counselling is not a process of giving advice, but it is a process of helping

your patient who is genuinely in need.

• It aims to help an individual to help himself to overcome his problem.

Goals of Counselling

• Alter maladjusted behaviors.

• Assist clients to move in the direction of fulfilling their potentials.

• Increase clients’ capacity to take rational control over feelings and actions.

• Enable the client’s ability to adapt or cope in a new environment or expectation

Book of D: Work and College

 It's been quite arduous lately, but I do realize how fortunate I am to work in higher education. I remember when I started working at UT Permian Basin (UTPB) in 2017. I was a "peer mentor/SI," which basically means I was tutoring students. My job consisted of helping students in English, history, statisics, government, phsychology, sociology, anthropology, and sometimes biology. Pretty much, I was helping in all aspects with the study of humanities. I did this as well at Midland College. I loved being a tutor. At some point, I even thought about becoming a professor. In 2018, the new Dean of Students (DOS) at UTPB convinced me to leave the "Student Success" division and work with him in the "Division of Student Affairs and Leadership" (DSAL). I love the job. I won't say what I do or which programs I facilitate because all that junk is already plastered in LinkedIn and other social media platforms. Do I brag? Probably. But, I don't do it with bad intentions. I am extremely proud of my hard work and accomplishments. My position with DOS and DSAL affords me to continue my studies in the counseling graduate program. Moreover, my wonderful job makes it so that I can continue my internship in counseling which entails over 300 hours this semester alone working with clients. I love counseling. I cannot imagine pursuing any other career right now, but had anyone told me ten years ago that this is what I would be doing . . . ANY OF THIS . . .  I would have told them they were crazy. 

Book of D: Counseling the UNCOUN'SELABLE

 Last night, I saw four new clients. All presenting with different conditions. Two of them in their teens (sisters) and severely hindered by mental and possible physical maltreatment. Their trust of others has been severely impacted for obvious reasons. I am going to have to approach the way I counsel them in a very different and cautious manner. First, I will establish a sound therapeutic relationship. I will include a lot of validation as I was advised to do during debriefing by my counseling supervisor and colleagues. Perhaps employing more non-talkactive measures like the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) or even Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR). The maternal grandmother has custody of the sisters. The sisters are evidently enraged at the world for the bad things that have happened to them, and the girls spare no animosity toward their grandmother - blaming her, too, for their negative life experiences these past five years. I have my hands full with these two, but hey, I did not decide on a career in counseling because it would be easy. Conversely, I have spent much time and beaucoup money on grad school to pursue this passion I have for counseling and helping others. Nowhere in the APA or ACA Code of Ethics or Principles of Counseling did it promise that counseling would be easy. Easy? NO! . . . Rewarding? Heck YES! 

Book of D: Prayers for Ukraine

I am by no means a political pundit or historian, if anything, I am a fan of politics and history. I leave the historian ascription to my spouse who has a master's degree in history. Look, I merely know the outskirts of the Russian-Ukrainian conflict. From what I have read, Putin claims he wants to ‘denazify’ Ukraine; moreover, he is adamant to block the Ukraine's attempt to join The North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO). The United States, Canada, and several Western European nations created NATO in 1949 to provide "collective security" against the Soviet Union. Due to the reasoning for the Organization, Putin has a fervent hatred of NATO and to have Ukraine, which was once part of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics (USSR), try to join western alliances is like a slap to Putin – or at least that is how he views it because he is a narcissistic fool who thinks everything revolves around him. Political pundits say that Putin will never subjugate Ukraine; therefore, he will continue to invade and bomb Ukraine with no endgame for the invasion.

What I further understand from the research I have done is that Ukraine is a currently recognized sovereign state. History shows that right before the dissolution of the Soviet Union, Ukraine did not have sovereignty; however, prior to the February 22nd (2022) invasion of Ukraine, Putin and Russia collectively recognized parts of Ukraine as sovereign states. This contradiction of sovereign recognition has created the tensions to intensify in the region. Whatever the reasons, Putin and his Russia had no real reason to invade independent Ukraine or wreak havoc on millions of innocent people. I include Russian citizens in the realm of "innocents" because millions of them are against the invasion, but they are sure to suffer from the repercussions of the blockades, export control restrictions, and sanctions imposed upon by the United States and its allies. Prayers for the world. Soap box over. 

Book of D: Nostalgic San Antonio: You Can Never Go Home Again

The adage, "you can never go home again," is from the 1934 Thomas Wolfe novel. The novel was published the same year my late mom was born – just had to add that. Anyway, the saying insinuates that people tend to overlook the negatives in their past because nostalgia often clouds their memories, thus, misleading them to remember the past in an exaggeratedly positive light. Some believe that humans incorrectly remember people, places, events, and such from their upbringing in static terms. Whatever the reason, I am a firm believer that you really can't go home again.

My spouse and I are still in San Antonio, celebrating our wonderful relationship which will be 24 years old on March 19th. While in San Antonio, we went to the rodeo on Friday night and stayed for the after-rodeo entertainment: STYX. On Saturday, we did a lot of shopping and drove to historic Alamo Heights to see how the area has undergone a lot of transformation (house flipping). We talked about how we would like to buy a bungalow in the neighborhood, but we agreed we would prefer a turn-key one versus one we would have to renovate. We hardly have time for home reno these days. Until I am finished with my master's degree in clinical counseling and my PhD in Higher Ed or Philosophy, my time for woodworking or carpentry is en attente. Anyway . . . My spouse and I finished our day's shopping venture at North Star Mall, and I remembered the times I went there with my ex and others. I remembered certain shops and eateries (most are no longer there) that my ex and I used to visit. I remembered the many conversations and bouts of laughter my ex, our friends, and I would have. My wife and I parked our suv in the covered parking garage near the Sea Island (on Rector) restaurant that my ex, her parents, and I loved to frequent. My wife and I had dinner at Tycoon Flats where my ex, her family, and I visited a few times whenever her brother would venture into town. It was kind of surreal at times, but I did not allow myself to get too enmeshed in the memories. While my wife and I dined at Tycoon Flats, we laughed at the cold weather anomoly plaguing San Antonio, and our bullheadedness in not letting the cold beat us; afterall, we are from West Texas where it really gets cold, so we're badass cold-weather-veterans (right?). We agreed to dine outside on the patio at Tycoon Flats; they had outdoor heaters, but they weren't positioned as well as they probably could have been, so our row of tables weren't really being heated very well. My wife and I could definitely feel the chill of the night; the temp was 40°. I ate my Tycoon Flats burger meal in record time. My poor wife was too cold and barely made a dent in her TF burger meal. We paid and left and made our way to the Starbucks closest to our downtown hotel, so we could warm up with vanilla chai lattes. However, the SB was cold, too; the employees were wearing cold weather apparel. I think it was the badly placed drive-thru area that was creating terrible cold, wind drafts in the entire establishment. My awesome wife and I just laughed because we couldn't seem to get away from the cold. So, here are my final thoughts as I blog in bed next to my beautiful wife. While driving around town and visiting/seeing the different venues, I remembered so many of the good times when I lived in San Antonio in the late 80s and early 90s. I finally allowed the memories of the bad times to course through my mind, and I was not sad. I did not allow myself to pivot inward to the point of melancholia; instead, I treasured where I was in my life now and who I was with, and I avoided "the feels." The nostalgia was quickly replaced by gratitude. And although you can never go home again, you can create a different home: a home that is better for you, one that makes you want to be better for your loved ones, and one that is infinitely full of love, compassion, and acceptance.

Book of D: San Antonio or Bust, part deux.

 Well, I spoke too soon. Upon getting closer to the quaint town of Fredericksburg (~ 10 miles), there was a long line of cars, like a wreck had occurred causing all traffic headed southbound on Highway 87 to come to a complete halt. One of the men in an unmarked vehicle came by to tell all drivers in line that the road leading into F-burg would be blocked for two more hours. Hm. The mrs. and I are wondering what's going on, and without internet connectivity, we're not going to know. Our only option is to turn back toward Mason and take another route. Damn it to hell.

Book of D: San Antonio or Bust

Ye old stomping grounds: I see ya, San Antonio. I haven't been here since last year before my Fall 2021 semester started. It was a swell time we had. We played things by ear, per se. We stayed at the downtown DoubleTree. I remember eating at a quaint type of nouveau establishment: The CommonWealth Coffee House at the Hemisfair Plaza.

This time around, we're staying at the Hampton Inn downtown. My spouse wanted to attend the San Antonio Rodeo & Bullriding event, so she purchased tickets for tonight's event at the AT&T Arena. I'm sure it will be fun. We both like watching bullriding on occasion. Especially when the major competitions are happening (e.g.,Vegas). She attended school with the famous bullrider Jim Sharp, so her interest in bullriding has been sparked for many years now. The weather is supposed to be antagonistic. Lol. The forecast is "cold and rain with drizzle," which is actually an upgrade compared to last night's weather app prediction of "rain with a mix of wintry sleet." We're hoping San Antonio will be more accommodating, weather-wise, if you will. If not, we'll get around it like we always have. We're driven in actual snow storms while traveling in the Texas Panhandle, Oklahoma, New Mexico, Colorado, and Kansas. Still . . . I'd rather have nice weather in San Antonio to better enjoy things. We're hoping to catch a live event on Saturday night, too. Maybe a theater production. I read there's a production of the Orphan playing at one of the community theaters. We shall see. For now, we're just excited to catch tonight's bullriding competition. The rest is just icing on the old proverbial cake. 

Book of D: Damn. All My Counseling Hours

To date, for the current Spring 2022 Internship I semester, I have completed over 159.50 counseling hours (86.50 direct and 73 indirect) with clients. 

During the Fall 2021 Practicum semester, I completed 123.50 total hours (77 direct and 46.50 indirect). 

During the Spring 2021 Practicum semester, I completed 133 total hours (77 direct and 56 indirect).  

Overall, I have over 416 total hours of counseling clients.

A more precise breakdown is 240.50 total direct hours to-date with clients and 175.50 total indirect hours to-date.