Book of D: Remembering Philip

As I was watching one of my favorite YT wood working channels, I thought about my dear nephew Philip. He would be 43 years young this June, 2023. He passed away much too soon (May, 2000). Why didn't Philip get to live as long as the rest of us? Why didn't Philip get to keep living as the rest of us have? Why was he pulled away to some unknown realm and denied the ability to stay with us? What did he do that was so wrong? I don't subscribe to the bullshit edict (or whatever you want to call it) that people die and go to heaven because "god" needed another angel. What kind of bullshit is that anyway! Philip was beloved and needed here, with us, his family. He had just moved in with a young lady he loved. He was just starting to come out of his shell, per se, and start living life. The shy but well-mannered young man was starting to do the things he wanted to do in life. He never hurt anyone or disrespected his family and elders. So, why did he not get to move forward with our family! So, it is now Wednesday, April 5, 2023, and I didn't get to finish the blog post from the 26th of March. Not sure why. I think it was just too much for my brain to process. But, I must say that not one day goes by that I don't think about my wonderful nephew. I remember how much he liked to discuss things that involved wood working, cars, music, books, movies, etc.... there wasn't much that I couldn't discuss with Philip. The one major topic included wood working and building things from scratch. I guess that is why the YT channel I mentioned earlier sparked thoughts of my beautiful nephew. I miss him. I miss Philip so damn much. I cried with my spouse a couple of days ago; actually, it was the day I started writing this post (March 26, 2023). I had not cried so much as I did that day. There is actually another reason for my bout of melancholia, but that will have to be a post for another day because that reason is ridden with way too much sadness and heartache in and of itself.