Mama, you were born on a Monday, September 3, 1934. You passed away (much too soon) on a Thursday, November 17, 2011. I was with you the morning you started your beautiful journey home to meet your Maker. We called 9-1-1 when you took a turn for the worse. My heart broke that I was not with you as you passed away in the ambulance. Your heart gave out. Your little body was so tired. After all, you had been battling with so many health issues for such a long time. You battled with hypertension, rheumatoid arthritis, dermatomyositis, and esophageal cancer. Never mind the many, many years before when you worked so hard in so many arduous and laborious jobs. I never knew a time that you did not work. As for your myriad of illnesses, Mama, you never gave up till the very end. You kept up our spirits by showing us how a strong person moves forward through adversity. You instilled sublime values in us and always, always showed us unconditional love. You passed away one week before your favorite holiday: Thanksgiving. It was so hard to celebrate it without you, but we did so for you; 'we were not going to start disappointing you now,' we all thought. We gathered at your beautiful home and celebrated. We laughed as we shared memories of you, and of course, we cried. Our hearts were so broken. As for myself, I felt such an emptiness, loneliness, and heartache; unlike anything I had ever felt. My stomach hurt and my jaw ached. I knew my sisters were feeling the same way, so I tried extra hard to be there for them that day. I even made sure we celebrated my sister Eva's birthday - as we always did on Thanksgiving since her grand day falls on the 25th. This might sound cheesy and blasé, but I have had people ask how long it took me to get over my mom's death, and my answer always has been and always will be . . . "as soon as I do, I'll let you know, but don't hold your breath." Personally, I know I will NEVER get over losing my dear, beautiful Mom. ¡Como te extraño, Mama!
Papi, you were born on a Thursday, October 24, 2918. You passed away on a Thursday, August 18, 1983. That was the first day of my junior year in high school. My life changed forever on that day. Life changed for all of us that day, dad, especially for mom. I wish I had had more time with you, dad. I didn't get to spend as much "quality" time with you like my siblings did, but we were on our way. Weren't we, dad? Life had other plans and although love was in abundance, time was not. You were so young when you left. I know it's not your fault. I have no one or nothing to blame for that, so I think the anger that plagued me for years is why I had such a difficult time letting go of people and things that weren't really right for me. I am grateful for the although too short 17 years I had you for my father, and I especially give thanks thart you instilled in me a virtue to love myself and avoid those who did not. Sometimes it took me a while, dad, to escape those people, but eventually, I figured things out. I miss you so much, Papi.
Rudy, Jr., my only brother, you were born on a Monday, March 5, 1956. You passed away on a Saturday, June 26, 2021. My brother, you, too, passed away much too soon. Although we were estranged for so many years, the last part of you life was most meaningful to me as we were trying to make up for lost time. You left behind a loving wife and three young men whom have all done amazing things with their lives. I know you were very proud of your family. Your family had grown exponentially during the past couple of years, and it was evident how much your wife, sons, and grandchildrten meant to you and how much you adored them. I miss you - I miss the "what could have been." It is similar to when we lost dad because our relationship was just beginning to rekindle when your Maker came around to reclaim you.
Philip, Jr., you were born on a Friday, June 13, 1980. You passed away on a Thursday, May 4, 2000. My dear nephew, you were more like a son to me, OMG, how it hurt when you died. I can still hear my brother's-in-law voice when he called to tell me that Philip "didn't make it." You were such an amazing person. I was always so proud of you. No matter how tough life was, you were stronger. I still envision you as a little boy with that cute crew cut who loved wearing cowboy boots and hats. You were so shy. As your grew into a young man, your innocence remained unadulterated by the ills that often consume others. You were very mindufl of others. Your love and respect of your mom, dad, sisters, grandma, all of us (your family) remains with to this day, and I often use you as the litmus test when your cousins bring home a date and such. You left behind big shoes to fill. You were my first Red Raider buddy. How fun it was to have gone to our first Texas Tech football game together in 1995. You, Rudy, Erica, and I had a blast. That is the memorty I mostly carry with me these days: the fun times. I miss you like crazy, Mijo.
Caty, my precious Maine Coon kitty. You were born on a Sunday, April 15, 2007; you "rescued" us in August of that year when you chose us to be your forever home. You passed away on a Monday, August 29, 2022. Your "mama" and I were with you, so was your aunt Josie and cousin Alex. We all took turns loving on you. The look on your mama's face is emblazoned in my memory as are her cries as you took your last breath and your heart beat for the last time. You were the best fur baby. You were never rambunctious or wild. You were so cool, calm, and collected. Your character made us feel safe and serene. Experts says your tranquil nature was because you were in a loving home with caring human parents. I agree to the extent that the love and respect was reciprocal. You are missed every single day, my Caty. You left such a huge gap in my heart. I'm not going to try to fill it. I am living with it and using my wonderful memories of you to carry on as best as possible. I miss you like the deserts miss the rain.
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